If I ever have time to blog again…

If I ever have time to blog again, the first thing I will do is extend a very special “Bon Jour” to Equilibre, the French-Canadian fitness site that likes to steal my blog posts, translate them into French, and post them as their own without giving me credit! Don’t believe me? Check it out HERE. (Sorry — I just want to see if they have the balls to steal this one now!)

Then, I would probably blog about how weird it is that “blog” is now used as a verb, when in fact the idea of a “blog,” even as a noun, was not a concept I could even begin to imagine back when I was the same age as my kids are now. And how my first job out of college was working for a computer storage company that sold cutting-edge products like the “DataKeg,” which was amazing because it could fit an entire gigabyte of data in one “small” (about the size of a mini-fridge) device… And how the only way to share data back then was with a fragile little floppy disk… And how I remember a couple years later, when I was about 25 years old and working at Penn State, the day an IT person came into our office and installed an ethernet cable and tried to explain to us what the internet and the World Wide Web was, and we thought he was nuts and that this was not really something that was going to ever affect us… So, clearly the concept of a “blog” or “blogging” was about as foreign to me as the concept of a rotary phone is to my kids today. And yet, here I am, just a few years later (yes, the concept of “few” is completely subjective), stressing out about not having enough time to blog.

If I ever had time, I’m sure I would also blog about my current first-world modern woman stress, if I didn’t think that my spoiled bratty whining would make you all hate me. Because, heck, *I* hate me when I hear myself complaining about some of the things I find myself getting stressed out over. However, upon further analysis, I think that most of my first-world stress boils down to one thing: Time. And/or lack thereof. So, when I find myself stressed out about something like, ‘Am I going to be able to fit in a workout today?’ or ‘When the heck am I going to have time to get my nails done before this big event on Saturday?,’ or, ‘Will I ever have time to blog again?,’ I’m really just stressing out about the fact that there are other, perhaps slightly more important things that are taking up my time and attention.

But if I did have the time, I would blog about my never-ending struggle to find that perfect “Goldilocks Space,” which is something one of my yoga instructors, Lori, calls it whenever we’re getting into a restorative pose that we’re going to hold for a long time. She tells us to only push until we find the edge, that place where we’re just starting to feel *something*—but not too much. And not too little. The sensation needs to feel JUST RIGHT, like you could hold the position for several minutes without it being painful, yet like enough of a stretch that you can tell your body is getting something beneficial out of it.

And since I practice yoga an average of three whole times per month, I am totally enlightened enough to find a way to stretch that metaphor to all aspects of my life. For example, now that I’ve successfully lost 10 pounds and met my goal during my 6-week weight-loss challenge (which you may have forgotten about since I have not had time to blog again since that started), I’ve got to find the Goldilocks Space that lies somewhere in between counting the grams of protein, fiber, and sugar in every single bite that crosses my lips, and scarfing down Thin Mints by the sleeve… Even on the professional front, I’m working on maintaining that “sweet spot” that I’ve found with freelancing, where I’m not taking on so much that there’s no time to enjoy my real life, and yet where I’m doing enough that I feel like I’m making a contribution to society… That “sweet spot” is the Goldilocks Space, and I particularly like that analogy because to me it means that you first have to try a bunch of different kinds of porridge—some too hot, some too cold—before you find the mix that is JUST RIGHT for you.

Oh, there are so many other topics I’m ready to tackle, if only I find the time to blog again. Like, how I could probably buy my college kid a new car for the amount of money he spends on Uber rides each month… How social media parent groups brings out the crazies–and how I don’t mean to marginalize or insult anyone with a true mental illness when I can’t think of a more appropriate term than “crazy” to describe the aforementioned parents… How I feel like a bad American because of how many times I’ve opted to watch Netflix over watching the Winter Olympics this year… How French press coffee has changed my life for the better… And the list goes on. But I’m out of time. No blogging today. Maybe next month!

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