Gosh, I loved the 80s.
Those were the years I came of age, and I embraced everything about the era—the big hair, the big combs, the big shoulder pads, the neon colors, and Madonna’s fingerless gloves. Bands like Kajagoogoo, Duran Duran and Wham! provided the soundtrack of my adolescence, and Michael Jackson’s Thriller video was the greatest thing I’d ever seen. Molly Ringwald and Tom Cruise were my cinematic heroes, and shows like Magnum P.I., Miami Vice and The Cosby Show were “must-see TV.” Continue reading “Everybody’s Got a Bomb, We Could All Die Any Day”
“’Twas the night before vacation, and all through the house….”
NO! Just NO! Don’t worry. I’m not going to do it. Enough of those lame parodies have been written already. Just Google “Twas the night before vacation,” and you’ll be as appallingly surprised as I was.
Continue reading “‘Twas the Night Before Vacation”
A little over a year ago, Janet Jackson announced to the world that she was expecting. At 50. And my husband sent me the following horrifying text:
Continue reading “Horrifying Texts Husbands Send”
So, this just happened: I tossed 2 Tide Pods into the washing machine and ran a full wash cycle on Permanent Press before realizing: I forgot to add the clothes.
Then there was the time I was driving to my dog’s groomer appointment, and realized a mile down the road that I forgot to bring the dog…
Continue reading “This is Your Brain on Menopause”
Soap opera fans will be familiar with this plot device:
Parents send Johnny off to summer camp at age 6. Six weeks later, Johnny returns with facial hair, a deep voice, and a boatload of grown-up problems. Meanwhile, the soap opera parents, even the ones who have spent the summer being cloned, kidnapped, and stranded on a desert island, haven’t aged at all. Continue reading “Like Sands Through the Hourglass…”
As I write this, I am on day 5 of a 5-day cleanse. This cleanse does not involve any green juice or kale, and sadly, I don’t appear to be losing any weight, either. That’s because this cleanse is actually a “Digital Detox” — a self-imposed hiatus from social media.
Continue reading “The Cleanse”
If you’re at all familiar with millennial vernacular, you’ve surely noticed the recent rise of the use of the word “adulting” as a verb. It’s the millennial term for taking on the grown-up responsibilities that come with adulthood, and is often preceded by a hashtag, as in: “Just made mac & cheese from scratch. #adulting” or, “Spent my whole paycheck on food and toilet paper. #adulting.”
Lord knows, I’m no millennial. I’ve been “adulting” since almost before the first millennial was born. And yet, I still often feel like an impostor grown-up. Even with the specter of 50 looming over the horizon, I feel like I have been taking the “fake it ’til you make it” approach to adulthood for the past 25 years. Continue reading “Adulting Like a Middle-Aged Boss”